Sho(la)down

… Or how to use statistics to prove any point you want, no matter how ridiculous…

Welcome to the first in what could become a regular feature, where I compare Shola to some of the world’s leading strikers.

Round One.

First up:

"Shola!? You have got to be shitting me!"

Fernando Torres. All £50 million of him.

Seem a ridiculous comparison?

Not really.

In terms of honours, actually, the picture is remarkably similar. Both have won a second division (whatever it is called now in England) title with the their home town team. In fact I would give Shola the edge as he was a part of Newcastle’s Intertoto Cup winning team (what do you mean it wasn’t a real trophy!?). Fair enough Torres won Euro 2008 and the World Cup 2010 (without really playing) with Spain, but I would argue that Shola could have taken Torres’ role in that Spanish team and they still would have won.

So let’s look at their stats from this season, so far to try and split them apart.

Torres: 43 appearances/10 goals
Ameobi: 29 appearances/9 goals

Wow.

So, averaged out.

Torres: One goal every 4.3 appearances
Ameobi: One goal every 3.2 appearances.

Obviously, Torres has a greater body of work than Shola, despite being two years younger, but, the question stands. Who would you rather have up front for your team this season? The Pendower Pele, scoring a goal just over every three games for an inconsistent mid-table team? Or El Nino, struggling to make a mark despite being surrounded by an expensively assembled cast of talent at the second best team in the league?

I’m sorry, Fernando. The answer is obvious. I have to agree with the away fans at Stamford Bridge yesterday: “You’re just a shit Ameobi”*

The Pendower Pele after hitting the back of the net. You'd struggle to find a pic of Torres in a Chelsea shirt in a similar pose.

*This season at least.